Hope
Actors are some of the most hopeful people on the planet and that is one of the things I love about being around actors and working with actors. While some people might call our dreams "lofty," we pursue them anyway and hope for the best. We hope our phones will ring, hope we'll get the part, hope the next job will be ours, hope we'll be able to continue doing what we love for our entire lives. Most of corporate America will never understand what it means to make your "passion" and your "career" or "job" interchangeable.
It's funny how hope is dangling in my face today and urging me not to write off pursuing acting altogether just yet. I'm not ready to be at peace with such a bold move (and I DID just get a whole bunch of repros of my pics...heh heh) but I am taking a serious and much needed break and I'm figuring out what that means as I go along. I didn't realize how entrenched I was and how everything around me has been built and catered around my pursuit for, literally, years. Breakdowns? Not looking at them. CD workshops? Cancelled. Wooing agents and manager? Nope. If anything, they should be wooing me. Mailings? None of that either. I'm even avoiding the theatre because right now it's just all bad ju joos.
So, it's ironic that I found myself signing some contracts for the pilot I did in March this morning and watching a rough cut of the first 15 minutes of the show. It is looking great, I don't hate myself in it (so far), and there is buzz. Huge agents are watching it. Networks are interested. It's in the process of being packaged for submission to all the big festivals. It's all so, again, "lofty" and I don't need to remind you that most pilots never get picked up. I mean really, it's a huge feat to get picked up at all, and then actors are often re-cast with bigger names. But...here I am getting smacked in the head with hope and thinking about how I can't wait to put this on my reel.
What reel?!? I'm taking a break!!!
Entrenched, I say. Totally, completely entrenched.
Comments