Moving East. Sticky & Sweet.

So the good news is, Year of the Fish has been extended another week.  It's moving from the Angelika to Village East Cinema tomorrow (Friday) if anyone in NYC feels like catching a sweet flick.  This weekend my agent is off to Toronto to support another client of his while I will be cramming for a theater audition for two separate roles.

My interest in the play waned after I read the entire script.  It's not very good.  The idea is there, but the dialogue needs a lot of work.  So much so that I am sort of shocked that it's being produced.  But I am trying to work through my disappointment and motivate to give it my best shot regardless.  I've come to realize that it's foolish to always expect great writing.  Who the heck do I think I am?  Geesh.  I am always happy to get the chance to work on stage, even though I'll have to fly and be away for a couple months.  But let's not put the cart before the horse - or however the hoo that saying goes.

An old friend of mine came for a visit last weekend.  And we had a fun time.  It's actually been a very long while since last we saw each other.  Plus we travel very different roads.  Sometimes I forget how different.  Hanging out with her again reminded me how lucky we are to do what we do and live where we live.  Of course everything's got pros and cons, and certainly our road is not the easiest one to travel.  But anyone who's able to identify something that excites them and actually do it is a lucky bastard.  The trick is staying excited and continuing to find opportunities to actually do it of course.  In any case, regardless of what anyone does, if they are able to find joy in the present no matter what or where or with whom, they are pretty blessed.  I guess that might be one thing I love about actors.  Correction: some actors.

Having no idea how many people actually read this thing, or how many people can actually stand reading mine, if you're still there, Dear Reader, at the risk of sounding fruity or cheesy or gooey or sticky like coconut rice, know that you and only you determine your worth and your value.  It's got nothing to do with getting an agent, scoring an audition, or booking a job.  I believe that as soon as you figure out exactly why you are pursuing what you are pursuing and genuinely feel good about that, and you realize that everything about you as you are right now in this very moment is absolutely perfect and as it should be, it'll straighten out your confidence and that's the single most important thing to get you where you want to go. 

It won't happen overnight.  But if you're willing to keep yourself open and aware and positive, you will do things you never knew were possible.  Sort of like the first time you do a headstand in yoga class without using the wall.  I don't know.  That was the first analogy that came into my head, which I haven't stood on in a while because the yoga joint by my pad closed a while ago, so I sometimes do it on my own.  And when I don't, I don't beat myself up about it.  I've found other things to do, in addition to drinking and cursing like a dirty greasy truck driver.

Now I could continue going off on random tangents.  Or I could get back to working on my ridiculously long sides.  Or I could take a photo of McCain and Palin and draw devil horns and goatees on their faces and pray to the Lord Almighty that the good people of our country are intelligent enough to see that they are useless, ignorant, lying hand puppets.

--Ming Ming